Yeah, I’m back. Whether you like it or not, I got some more toys. Hey, you’ll love today! It’s some ACTION figures! This is gonna be great, you’ll love it! Oh man, you are so in for a treat! Noodles! So awesome, great, fantastic and other words that go with that… anyway look, you’ll like it… I think.
Okay, I lied…
Yeah… Look at these. Take a long, hard, contemplative look. These are Barnyard Commandos… Far as I know this is the entire set. Four sheep and four pigs… You’d think there’d be room for more like… cows… chickens… something else? I dunno. Either way it’s about as stupid as Fighting Foodons. Either way… ugh… These things are NOT ACTION FIGURES! they’re IN-action figures. Most boring thing I’ve uncovered.
I also uncovered this letter A… awww, what a cute little A… I’m sure nothing would come out of OH SHI—
Yeah, that’s right, Alphabet letters that transform into robots. These were a thing. I actually thought these were pretty cool looking as a kid. I was really heavy into robot stuff. It’s a shame I never got the complete alphabet… My childhood wasn’t really that complete thanks to it… I still have troubles with my F’s and M’s…
However I guess what made up for that were these other, less surprising and interesting alphabet letters that transform into whatever the letter represented. Meh… I still prefer the robots. If Optimus Prime isn’t coming up to me during Sesame Street than I don’t really give a rats.
But of course, in my new more mature (debatable) age… I can’t help it…
Well, let’s be honest, this is what you’re here for! TURTLE POWER! Yes I have tons… uhm.. well I USED to have tons of Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles figures… *sighs* man these were so cool… I don’t know a kid in my school without one. And if they didn’t have any, they were probably very psychotic. Cause only normal children had hideously malformed characters like this:
Now… I think I had all the main turtles… I seem to still have Raphael’s belt… Maybe he just evaporated into thin air. But if anything he might’ve just went missing under “mysterious circumstances” with fire involved… He wasn’t my favorite.
Donatello didn’t take it well… He went on to be a very well mannered psychotic.
Leo went on to get a new job as a police officer… I dunno, he might’ve went through the same Police Academy as Bobcat Goldthwait
Mikey took up several jobs… Surfer… Clown… Drunken Reprobate…
But really, what made the toyline really shine for me were the Turtles “rogue gallery” which more or less were just toys to increase the diversity of mutated animals that WOULD have given it a furry rating, but meh… it’s a cartoon. Aside from Dirtbag (who got tossed for having a burnt torso… no kidding) these were the only ones I could honestly find in my collection:
Genghis Frog, who in the cartoon show had about three brothers, one of which actually had his own toy. But yeah… He has a boogie board for a shield and a tongue gun… So if you’re ever held up in the alleyway by him he’ll just lick you to death… A fate I truly would not care for.
This guy, whom I forget the name of, had a tail that was probably stuck in the mud for like… five years. Because when I found it, it was discolored and covered in filth. But he has the coolest friggin’ guns I’ve ever seen for this toyline.
Wingnut is one of those weird characters that is obviously making fun of another franchise of the 80′s… I wonder what that could be? Anyway, it was neat how he had a little partner called Screwloose… Who just mutated into this other giant mosquito I remember seeing but never owning… Either way, Wingnut’s major problem is that he constantly points downward.
Mondo Gecko was one of my favorites, probably because he was as wild looking as Mikey in the show… or at least that’s what I assumed. He also had tattoos? I think… Or stickers. I think one was on his shirt cause it’s gone and there’s some residue left. I’d love to get a complete version of him again sometime if I could. Anyone else got like a Ratfink vibe from this guy as well?
Shredder and Super Shredder from the movie… two completely opposite figures of the same character… I mean.. why is Super Shredder so damn small?… but yeah… I managed to find Shredder’s legs and cape… but he’s still… awkward… I’ll just leave it at that.
Scumbug… yeah… I remember getting this and my mom said “ugh… these things are ugly! Why do you want such ugly things?” So I just bought more after that cause I figured “hey… that’s awesome that I grossed out my mom with these things”
Oh yeah… Wyrm… I friggin’ LOVE this guy. He’s just so… ODD! I mean, you pull his hair and his eyeballs bug out and he has a giant chomper! Only thing I don’t get is that he has a belt made of worms and a wrench with a porcupine tied to it for some reason… But yeah, I love this guy. I’m keeping him.
I had this toy before I saw the episode he was in… where he was a complete retard… I just remember him being in that awesome video game and he looked like a really awesome creepy alternate universe Turtle… like… you know, every series had a dark copy cat antagonist somewhere. So I guess I just like that even though it’s a cliche. Besides, he actually looks DIFFERENT from the original four. Keeping him too.
I gotta be honest, I dunno why I have Usagi Yojimbo… Cause… I don’t like him. I’m sorry… I never liked his comics. I’m guess they’re great, that’s fine, if you like em all the power to you, and I can commend that… But seriously… he’s freaking boring to me…
Now… these other ones are kind of missing a lot of important parts… such as… limbs and etc… which I have to be honest will be difficult to sell… but I dunno if I’ll even get rid of them in the first place for money, they’re so old and show a lot of wear and are pretty dirty… to the point where it’s difficult to clean them up. But hey, who knows… If you take interest let me know.
Yeah… Metalhead was alright… But his thing broke… his… I dunno backpack?… Also his belt seems to be missing. I guess he can get Raph’s belt since he won’t be using it where he is at the moment. Which is Dimension X.
Chrome Dome is probably the stupidest named figures I have… As I always assumed he was a robotic version of Shredder. But he is missing one of his little silver wing thingies on his back.
Mutagen Man… if I had all his parts I’d keep him CAUSE HE IS SO AWESOME AND CREEPY! He’s basically a mess of organs in a jar! That’s a step above a brain in a jar… Either way, he also had a ton of stuff that you could put in his jar that’d float around or… just sink to the bottom…
Ace Duck was stupid… Maybe that’s why I loped off his friggin’ head… Actually no… I have no idea where his head is. But he’s just… idiotic to me… I dunno why I had him. The only ducks I actually liked were the Duck Tales ducks…. Darkwing Duck… Donald Duck… Count Duckula… yeah
I… Have a feeling that this thing ended up spinning his head around like an idiot? I have no idea why ANY figure would want to have its head spin… especially one of a character who HAS NO REAL ABILITY TO DO THAT! But it doesn’t work anyway… the button is broken so he just looks eternally braindead. Poor Bebop.
Yeah… if you can guess where these are from… let me know… either way they’re probably trash. I have no real Turtle weapons… they all FRIGGIN’ BROKE!!!
This guy seems to be the prize of the collection, as he’s probably the weirdest character ever… You can put a Foot Soldier on his seat but I never had one… So he just shot and buzzsaw’d Turtles in half every time I played with him… He’s a friggin’ psycho and I like it. I might keep this guy too actually… I really would like to find someone who custom paints old figures to sort of give him more detail. The guy has friggin’ bullet holes and TEARING SCARS on his body!
Well… that’s it… Turtles forever and Pizza Time everyone. Maybe next time I’ll have some more things to show. But who knows.